I've really been struggling with the concept of prayer:
- If God is going to do what he wants, why pray?
- If it's going to work out in the end, but not the way I asked, why pray?
- If we do pray and then He doesn't answer, why should we have wasted the time to pray?
** Prayer is more about our relationship with our heavenly Father than about Him answering them.**
A week ago Sunday, I asked the Lord if we could be at 50% by the end of the week. At that time we were at 44%. We had an amazing week. By Thursday night we are at 47.8% I really thought we would make it to 50% by Friday.
Friday morning, a lady called to tell me they were going to support us for $50 a month. I was overjoyed. Because of my response to her support, she called her mom to ask her if she was serious about supporting us. Her mom said yes, and they came on board for $25 a month. This excitement put us at 48.9%!!! Needless to say I was beside myself. I was certain that we would be at 50% by the end of the day!
Well, it's Tuesday morning and even through we've gone up to 49.3%, we're still not at 50%. So if I look at it, God didn't answer my prayer. But, was the prayer being answered the most important thing? I would have to say no. The most important thing to remember was my relationship with God. Not being at 50% means I have to decide, sometimes hourly, to rest in Him. I have to make the choice not to worry and stew over where we're at. I have to decide to keep myself in His word and the truth I find there. I have to keep my faith and believe that His plan is perfect and mine is not.
I wish that I could say that I'm doing back flips over this concept, but I'm not. But it is exciting because slowly but surely I am growing.
So praise Him today for those prayers He is answering. Praise Him for the ones He decides not to answer because it seems, at least to me, that those are the times when we have to hold tight to our Father and trust Him for what lies ahead.